First case:
Sis in law and I were in a bus this morning, discussing about how bland H's (Nephew's caretaker) cooking is. We were just laughing about it until Sis in law said, "Pero nasa loob ang kulo nyan."
"What do you mean," I said.
"May nabasa ako sa cellphone niya"
She mentioned that H is gossiping about us to a former housemate (who is actually backstabbing us the whole time). H has a code name for all of us. Sis in law said, she doesn't want to tell me what my code name is...else it will hurt me. I agreed. It kind of ruined my mood in the morning. And all my insecurities fell into me. The first thing that came into my mind is my acne. My code name must have something to do with acne. I got insecure but I quickly snap myself out of it.
"She is just a maid. With an idle mind."
"She must be that sad, that's why she gossips."
Well nevertheless even if these words mean nothing, it can struck you.
"What do you mean," I said.
"May nabasa ako sa cellphone niya"
She mentioned that H is gossiping about us to a former housemate (who is actually backstabbing us the whole time). H has a code name for all of us. Sis in law said, she doesn't want to tell me what my code name is...else it will hurt me. I agreed. It kind of ruined my mood in the morning. And all my insecurities fell into me. The first thing that came into my mind is my acne. My code name must have something to do with acne. I got insecure but I quickly snap myself out of it.
"She is just a maid. With an idle mind."
"She must be that sad, that's why she gossips."
Well nevertheless even if these words mean nothing, it can struck you.
Second case:
Let us flashback a memory last December 2013 while were having a company Christmas lunch. We were laughing and catching up with our holiday plans when this HK Aunty turned SG citizen office seatmate turned its attention to me and asked, "How come you have pimples, ah!"
Felt like I wanted to splash her with hot water but I just used my invisible magic and suddenly she disappeared in my sight. In short, she became non existent to me the whole lunch - or actually until now. I didn't respond to her and pretended that I didn't hear anything or see anyone (mean yeah). But the people around us heard it and they experienced a lingering silence when I didn't respond to her lol
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Actually it all boils down to my insecurity. My face.
Well good thing I have a boyfriend...He likes me with acne or not. That's what I keep on thinking after lol
Actually it all boils down to my insecurity. My face.
Well good thing I have a boyfriend...He likes me with acne or not. That's what I keep on thinking after lol
For those with similar experience, I want to share with you this line in Sara Bareilles song, Brave.
You can be amazing
You can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug
You can be the outcast
Or be the backlash of somebody’s lack of love
Or you can start speaking up
Nothing’s gonna hurt you the way that words do
And they settle ‘neath your skin
Kept on the inside and no sunlight
Sometimes a shadow wins
♥,
Cecily
